Mentoring Liason
Edith Boiquaye
Senior in Civil Engineering
eboiquay@purdue.edu
~ To ensure that theme of mentoring is present in our monthly meetings
~ To provide resources to expand our perception of and skill in both mentoring and being mentored
~ To have a connect point between the program's mentoring goals and participants' needs and concerns
Upcoming Mentoring Social
Author of Hidden Figures Visiting Purdue
Hello friends! Below describes an opportunity many of you may be interested in:
A number of campus groups have come together to bring the author of the book Hidden Figures, Margot Lee Shetterly, to campus. Ms. Shetterly will be speaking on Wednesday, January 25th at 7:30pm in Loeb Playhouse. The event is free and open to the public. Copies of the book will be for sale that evening, and Ms. Shetterly will be signing books following her talk.
A link to more information about the event is here.
Click here to watch the trailer for the Hidden Figures movie, currently in theaters.
Striking Up a Conversation: Conversing with a New Acquaintance
Hello! As promised {albeit, a little late}, here are some tips for striking up and sustaining a conversation with someone you have just met. Whether sharing a meal or trying out a new activity together, intentionally engaging and responding in conversation can lay the foundation for a great relationship, or, at the very least, a pleasant exchange. See below for practical tips!
- Make the Decision to be Present
- We oftentimes go through our days not fully present in situations. We're often distracted by electronics, our surrounding or situations other than the one in front of us. Making the conscious decision to "check-in" and be fully-aware of the other person in front of us is the foundation for meaningful connections. If this mentality isn't present, the longest list of tips and tricks of conversation making will not help you. You have to agree that the person you are engaging with you is important and worth your full attention and participation.
- A good way to get in this state of mind is to make the choice to appreciate the person in front of you. Take full note of their appearance and being and think on the fact that someone loves them deeply, whether it be a parent, a significant other, Higher Power or any other person. Knowing that someone is precious to someone else helps us value them as well.
- Refuse to Focus on Yourself
- When we are constantly focused on ourselves - how we feel, how nervous we are, how this interaction is affecting us - we rob ourselves of the ability to truly engage with someone. Have you ever tried to talk to your friend when they were preoccupied with themselves in the moment? It is undoubtedly discouraging and stems the flow of interaction.
- This is not to say that you shouldn't share about yourself and be honest about how you're feeling when asked. There is a difference between being open and reciprocal in a conversation and being too preoccupied with other things that the other person feels like they're encroaching on you while they converse.
- Come Prepared
- This may sound a bit much, but there is no shame in preparing to meet with someone you don't know well for the first time. Come with fun, engaging topics in mind that you can organically bring up when there is a lull in the conversation. Brush up on current events worldwide, nationally and locally. If you've been able to talk to them a bit previously, do a bit of research on some interests they may have mentioned. Going out of your way to learn more about what interests a person, for most people, is touching and helps more quickly create comfortable conversation. If someone is really passionate about a topic, give them the chance to teach you a bit. Giving people the space to talk about something they love will put people at ease and make them more likely to reciprocate and hear you out as well.
This was a very brief discussion of some ways to ease the nervousness you might experience in drumming up a conversation. For more information, check out the links below. Feel free to respond to this post with questions, comments and your own tips!
Additional Resources:
- http://www.wikihow.com/Start-a-Conversation-When-You-Have-Nothing-to-Talk-About
- http://www.inc.com/minda-zetlin/10-foolproof-ways-to-start-a-conversation-with-absolutely-anyone.html
- http://www.thesimpledollar.com/20-ways-to-start-a-conversation-and-build-into-a-connection/
- We oftentimes go through our days not fully present in situations. We're often distracted by electronics, our surrounding or situations other than the one in front of us. Making the conscious decision to "check-in" and be fully-aware of the other person in front of us is the foundation for meaningful connections. If this mentality isn't present, the longest list of tips and tricks of conversation making will not help you. You have to agree that the person you are engaging with you is important and worth your full attention and participation.
- A good way to get in this state of mind is to make the choice to appreciate the person in front of you. Take full note of their appearance and being and think on the fact that someone loves them deeply, whether it be a parent, a significant other, Higher Power or any other person. Knowing that someone is precious to someone else helps us value them as well.
- When we are constantly focused on ourselves - how we feel, how nervous we are, how this interaction is affecting us - we rob ourselves of the ability to truly engage with someone. Have you ever tried to talk to your friend when they were preoccupied with themselves in the moment? It is undoubtedly discouraging and stems the flow of interaction.
- This is not to say that you shouldn't share about yourself and be honest about how you're feeling when asked. There is a difference between being open and reciprocal in a conversation and being too preoccupied with other things that the other person feels like they're encroaching on you while they converse.
- This may sound a bit much, but there is no shame in preparing to meet with someone you don't know well for the first time. Come with fun, engaging topics in mind that you can organically bring up when there is a lull in the conversation. Brush up on current events worldwide, nationally and locally. If you've been able to talk to them a bit previously, do a bit of research on some interests they may have mentioned. Going out of your way to learn more about what interests a person, for most people, is touching and helps more quickly create comfortable conversation. If someone is really passionate about a topic, give them the chance to teach you a bit. Giving people the space to talk about something they love will put people at ease and make them more likely to reciprocate and hear you out as well.
- http://www.wikihow.com/Start-a-Conversation-When-You-Have-Nothing-to-Talk-About
- http://www.inc.com/minda-zetlin/10-foolproof-ways-to-start-a-conversation-with-absolutely-anyone.html
- http://www.thesimpledollar.com/20-ways-to-start-a-conversation-and-build-into-a-connection/
Coming Up...
I want to firstly extend a big "thank you" to all returning participants who attended our Mentor Training in August. The turn out was phenomenal, the energy in the room was tangible and the comments on the evaluations are useful and encouraging. Looking at the evaluations, there seems to be a consensus that:
- We should host another mentoring training;
- You would benefit from more examples of mentoring situations and how to navigate them; and
- You would also appreciate more opportunity to practice your newly-honed mentoring skills.
We want to provide you with the tools you need to help mentor other women and be mentored yourself. We plan to respond to your feedback in the following ways:
- Having takeaways at monthly meetings that challenge you to form relationships with other women in the program
- Host a mentoring social that will incorporate and hone key mentoring skills
- Regularly update the blog with mentoring-related topics and answers to questions
- Pester ya'll for more input, criticism and suggestions ^ . ^
Reminder: This is a blog and part of the beauty of a blog is the fact that people can comment and a conversation among multiple people can occur. Please do comment with thoughts or concerns. I thrive on feedback!
Until next time!
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