Some Sticky Mentoring Situations

Hello again! Let's talk mentoring again, and, specifically, dealing with some sticky situations (paraphrased from icre.pitt.edu).

Challenge: Mentee shows a lack of commitment to the mentoring relationship
Strategy: As a mentor, seek to discern the cause of the lack of commitment. Are you two not well-matched? Is there a difference in personality that leads the mentee to find it hard to confide in you? Is the mentee lacking in the intrinsic motivation to maintain this relationship? For every action and behavior, there is a cause, and it is important for the mentor to discover this cause.

Challenge: Mismatch between mentor and mentee (personality/expectations/motivations/etc)
Strategy: If the mentor and mentee agree that the relationship cannot work out because of this mismatch, the relationship can mutually move away from one of a mentee-mentor interaction. If both the mentee and mentor are willing to learn from each other and continue on in their relationship, however, significant growth between the two people can happen that wouldn't otherwise.

Challenge: Breaching confidentiality - As in any important/close relationship, breaching confidentiality can be very significant and hurtful. Whether the mentor or mentee has broken silence, a considerable amount of trust can be lost.
Strategy: The best way to handle breaching confidentiality is to avoid it at all costs. Establish and reiterate expectations of confidentiality. If it does happen, however, and the mentee and mentor wish to continue on in the relationship, communication is key to repairing the damage. They should converse with each other about intentions, mentalities and the cause of this breach in confidentiality. Both parties must have a mind towards openness, forgiveness and reconciliation. For the hurt party, it is helpful to remember that we have all messed up in this area and we all desire forgiveness when we've done so.

"A person's wisdom yields patience; it is to one's glory to overlook an offense." ~ King Solomon